Chapter 3
I woke up in Jessica’s bed with Avery snoring next to me.
Oh god, she’s back in the front again, Rhys said, which startled me, but thankfully Avery just rolled over.
Leave her alone, so she can get ready for work, a voice said that I wasn’t familiar with. That must be Singer.
Shit, I didn’t want to deal with their job again, but I really didn’t want to have Rhys yelling in my ear all day if I messed anything up, so I crawled out from bed, and Avery just rolled over.
Why do we put up with this guy again? He doesn’t even have a job. I thought while walking over to the bathroom.
He’s just in between jobs at the moment, and he’s been good to us. Nyx said.
I had my doubts, but I didn’t really feel like getting into a fight with the headmates while taking a shower. I got ready as quickly as I could, as I really wanted to get out of the apartment before Avery woke up.
Um, I might have a problem. I still have no idea how to drive, I said while grabbing our purse and keys and hurrying out of the apartment while Avery started groaning.
I’ll just take over for a bit. That’s what the brain did yesterday, Singer said.
I got into the car, and I ignored our phone as it pinged with a new message.
***
I don’t know if I’d ever get used to these time skips. Hopefully, I wouldn’t have to get used to anything. I figured it’d be easy enough to go to the library or back to the hospital after work and find a way to get out of this body. It was boring being a ghost, but I’ll take that any day over having to live someone else’s life.
“Why did you ghost me at the market?” Violet asked as I was getting settled at Jessica’s desk.
“Ghost you?” I asked.
Fuck, she doesn’t know anything, why is the brain putting her in control now?
“...turned, and you were just gone, and then I messaged you and never heard anything back until hours later, and I was just panicking that something happened to you.” I missed the start of what she was saying.
“Sorry, Avery had a crisis and I had to take off,” I said.
“Of course he did,” Violet walked away before I could say anything else.
You all need to stop talking so much, I can’t focus on anything. I said, and felt like I needed to shake my head to be able to focus again.
Yeah, we’ll stop being a distraction, or you could just leave everything to us. Rhys said.
I would if I could, I said, and started with checking our calendar and email to see what I actually needed to do today.
Thankfully today was a much busier day, even if it was still dreadfully boring, and I think I was able to make things a bit better with Violet, by leaving a can of Arizona Tea on her desk, at Nyx’s recommendation. Then there was Avery’s messages to deal with.
9:32a: Babe, you left without giving me a kiss this morning
9:34a: I thought you weren’t angry with me anymore?
9:39a: Why are you ignoring me again?
11:17a: Sorry to keep bugging you at work
11:18a: Since, I wasn’t able to have friends over yesterday, would it be okay if I had them over tonight?
11:18a: And if you wouldn’t mind making some snacks?
I really didn’t understand what Jessica (or the people that made up Jessica) saw in this guy. He reminded me of Jeremy who would send letters to me everyday, and try and get my attention everytime he saw me in town.
11:32a: Dear, you can invite your friends over, and I would be delighted to provide some snacks for everyone. I do need to make a stop after work on my way home though.
I didn’t get any messages back during my lunch, and Violet was busy with a meeting, so I had some time to work through my thoughts.
So obviously Jessica’s life could use some help, and I could either just go along with the motions and just try and get out of this body as quickly as possible, or I could spend some time or effort and try and improve Jessica’s life. Especially if I was going to be stuck here for a while. It seemed clear to me that Avery was just a drain on her life, and that Violet was a close friend, but that she didn’t really think about the impacts that she had on Jessica.
It wasn’t really my problem though, and I didn’t want to do anything to change Jessica’s life without talking to the alters first. So, really it was the best idea to just get out of this body as quickly as possible.
I tried to focus on work as much as possible, with occasional breaks to chat with Violet, both to actually apologize, but also to distract from how brain meltingly boring their work was. I learned that Violet had another event she was going to tonight, but she didn’t invite me this time. Which I understood, but it still hurt.
It was finally time to clock out, and I had decided to start with the hospital and just hope that proximity would allow me to leave. I got into the car, but this time I was determined to see how it worked, and I kinda wish that I hadn’t.
I managed to stay in the front, but I didn’t have any control of the body, so I was just watching as the body I had by now gotten used to just seemed to move on its own. Singer moved so calmly with the body while the car moved at speeds that nothing should be allowed to move at.
It didn’t matter how much I screamed, and some higher portion of my brain was starting to understand that it was actually making things worse. That didn’t stop the animal part of me from trying to claw my way out of the restraints on my hands and legs. I knew that it was my fault for biting that bitch nurse, but she had it coming.
“Fucking hell Annie, I need you to keep it together while I’m driving,” Singer said with our mouth. Also a tremendously unsettling experience.
My apologies, I said, and focused more on the inner world. I don’t think I could handle just focusing on the real world and these damned cars.
I finally got a closer look at Singer in doing so. He was tall, but his posture was stooped, and he had a skeletal looking but robotic left arm, and a metal right eye. There were various metal plates and wires spread across his body.
“It’s okay, I know that it can be hard when you’re new,” Singer said, and I swore he managed to make the same voice I used so much softer and comforting. “I know that Rhys gave you a hard time, but last night wasn’t bad, and I think it was nice that we got a little more time with Violet.”
It’s difficult to understand the way people write to each other nowadays, I said. I didn’t know he didn’t meant it when he said I could do whatever I wanted.
“It was an interesting choice for the brain to make you a ghost from a 100 years ago, but I don’t think you’re the weirdest alter it’s come up with,” Singer said.
The brain didn’t come up with me, I said and pulled further away from the front. I know that Singer kept talking, but I just ignored him.
How could they not see that I was different from them? It doesn’t matter though. I’m just going to get out of this body as quickly as possible and then I wouldn’t have to think about them ever again, and can find a better person to hop a ride with.
I felt a brief pull before I was back in the front parked outside of where the hospital should be, but it was missing.
“What in the heavens happened?” I asked and stepped out of the car. There was a fence around the perimeter.
The hospital was set for demolition. That’s why we explored the night before, Nyx said.
“You could have said something before I asked Singer to drive all the way out here,” I said, and although I wanted to snap at them, I didn’t have the heat behind the words. Instead, I just felt numb, and like I could float away at a moment’s notice.
Maybe you could find some information at the library to help? Nyx offered.
“Yeah, maybe,” I managed to say, and the body started to move to drive, but I pulled away from the front.
***
The public library was a monstrosity of architecture. I had gotten used to the boring blocks of office buildings, but I had no words for how this library was constructed. It looked like it was put together from left over parts of other buildings with a single column supporting the entrance.
“God is dead,” I said while getting out of the car.
You can’t say things like that, Nyx scolded me, and I did notice a few looks from people walking by.
It’s a public library, they should be used to some crazy people, Singer said.
I could feel Nyx’s disapproval, but she didn’t actually say anything in response. I was distracted by the inside of the library, and how different it was than I was expecting. There weren’t any books in sight from the entrance, but instead there was a cafe, there were screens everywhere, and people meandering and loitering around benches and displays of art.
I wandered further into the building where there were librarians behind a circular desk in the middle of a room, and finally spotted stacks of books in the wings of the library, but I was dismayed that I couldn’t see where the card catalog was. I spent a few minutes wandering up and down the stacks, and around the building confused.
Singer started asking something in my head, while a man started asking a question, and I could not process what they were saying. I tried shaking my head, and turned to the man.
I could not process anything further he was saying as I took in his appearance. He was a little shorter than Jessica. He looked like he should have been on display along with other ancient greek statues, and his eyes were a hazel that I felt like I could explore like an astronaut in a nebula. He had short deep blue spiky hair, a nose piercing, and several ear piercings. He wore a button up shirt with little cartoon characters that felt familiar even though I could not recognize them, and his arms were covered in black and white tattoos. There was a geometric whale that caught my eyes in particular.
Shit, he was still talking.
“I’m so sorry, I got a bit disoriented. What were you saying?” I asked.
He gave a small smile, and said, “No worries, I was just asking if I could help you find something?”
“Yes, I was trying to find the card catalog,” I said.
He looked confused for a moment. “We don’t have a physical card catalog anymore, but I can help you use one of our computers to search, what kinda book are you looking for?”
“That would be amazing. I was trying to find some books on ghost possessions,” I said.
“Worried you got someone else hanging out with you?” He asked with a soft laugh.
Was I that obvious? No, it’s just a joke, stop being so weird.
“Oh yeah, I went to St Urban’s before it was demolished to do some ghost hunting, and just want to do more research,” I said.
“Oh that’s so cool,” he said. I followed him to a desk with a computer, and he navigated and typed on the computer faster than I was able to keep up with.
“They’re all in the same section for 130, I can take you over there,” he said and started walking towards the stacks.
“Feels like everything’s changed so much,” I said as I caught a glimpse of some kids being shown how to use some futuristic device off to the side of the room.
“It’s been a while since you’ve been to the library huh?”
“You could say that.”
“Well, here you are. You can grab whatever books look interesting and snag a table or one of the private study rooms if you want. If you want to check anything out, you can get help at the front desk on your way out, and anything you don’t, please set back on these carts. It helps with funding since it shows circulation. And if there is anything else you need, I’ll be at the information desk.” He walked away before I was really able to process everything he said, but I had a job to do anyway.
I grabbed every title that sounded at all relevant and scurried off to find one of the private rooms that the librarian had mentioned. I got settled and started looking through the stack.
I jotted down a handful of notes that might have been helpful, but I was not optimistic. Most of the books seemed to have no idea what they were talking about, some said that possession doesn’t exist, and a few just said to ask the ghost kindly to leave.
I probably should’ve realized this sooner, but all of the books were assuming the reader was the one wanting to get rid of the ghost, and so assumed that the ghost would be able to leave if they wanted to. I sat there staring at the stack of books for a while as it slowly dawned on me, I was out of leads. I was stuck.
